Her Father's Daughter

Sierra couldn't find her toothbrush the other night, and it was about time for a new one anyway, so I opened up a new package and gave her a new lime green one. She was pumped, new toothbrushes are really exciting around here. Last night she walks into the livingroom at toothbrushing time, carrying her old, frazzled, pink toothbrush. When I asked her where she found it, she said, "On the floor. Behind the toilet. In a cup of medicine." While I might not be totally sure what all is on the floor, behind the toiIet, I promise there are no cups of medicine. Anyways, I made a face and told her to throw it away. Her expression was as if I had suggested drowning a sack of kittens. "But it's my toothbrush."
"It's old and disgusting, and you have a new one."
"You can't just throw it away!"
"Ok, give it to me, I'll hold on to it."
She looks at me very skeptically, and backs away into the bathroom to finish her business. When she comes back, she asks me what I'm doing with her toothbrush.
"Snuggling it."
"Then what?"
"Then I'm going to throw it away, because it is gross."
"NO! It's just, it's just that, I really want to keep it."
Of course. If there is no room in the box with your collection of Sweet Tea lids, or in the stack of graded TAKS math worksheets which you might want to look at when you are older, just tuck it into the drawer with your dad's Girbauds.

Dinner Theatre

We were eating a peaceful dinner the other night, everything was going swimmingly, when all the sudden out of the blue, Sierra goes, "Momma, Daddy called me a jackass." What??? I look at Brian and he looks confused... "A year and a half ago! When I was on Autry's bed! He did!" Brian jumps on this opportunity to cross examine, and he keeps getting her on all the details - the final story she comes up with is that Brian was laying on the bed in Autry's room, she hit his feet (but he wasn't really sleeping of course - I think she has pulled that same trick with Grandpa, right Dad?) Anyways, so he called her a jackass, she ran and told me, and I came in and spanked him. And he told her jackass wasn't a bad word because it is in the Bible and it means donkey, "but donkeys AREN"T SMART!" If there is anything in the world that makes Brian happier than getting random people worked up it is getting the kids worked up at the dinner table, because then I start freaking out, so it is like double points for him... anyways, he gets this look in his eyes, "So, Sierra, if you can't remember the details of your little story, how do you know Autry wasn't the one who called you a jackass?" He turns to Autry, who has been quiet this whole time, "Autry, did you call Sierra a jackass a year and a half ago?" She slowly looks around the table, then looks at him. Then, with perfect nonchalance, "Ohhh yeeahh..." Brian and I were laughing so hard, tears were rolling down our faces. Sierra, never one to under-react, FLIPPED. She was immediately standing up in her chair, jumping up and down, her face bright red, "NO AUTRY NO YOU DID NOT CALL SISSY A JACKASS YOU COULDN'T EVEN TALK DADDY DID IT DADDDDDDYYYYYYY!!!!!!!" So, final score, Daddy - 1, Jackass - 0.